Trust a crowd to look at the wrong end of a miracle every time..

Incidentally, I am honorary president of the American Humanist Association, having succeeded the great science fiction writer and biochemist Dr. Isaa….

Humanists try to behave decently and honorably without any expectation of rewards or punishments in an afterlife. The creator of the universe has bee….

Characters paralyzed by the meaninglessness of modern life still have to drink water from time to time..

Symbols can be so beautiful, sometimes..

Do you think Arabs are dumb? They gave us our numbers. Try doing long division with Roman numerals..

Take it from somebody who has been around for a million years: When you get right down to it, food is practically the whole story every time..

A sane person to an insane society must appear insane..

If facts weren't funny, or scary, or couldn't make you rich, the heck with them..

Beer, of course, is actually a depressant, but poor people will never stop hoping otherwise..

How embarrassing it is to be human..

But I have to say this in defense of humankind: In no matter what era in history, including the Garden of Eden, everybody just got here. And, except ….

The Circle Theatre, black people had to sit in the balcony. Any theater with a balcony, black people had to sit up there. Black people couldn't check….

Having a yacht is a reason for being more cheerful than most..

You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do..

We're a terribly lonesome society. For all I know, all societies are. You can make a few new friends, that's all. You can't change history. History i….

But some of the nonsense was evil, since it concealed great crimes. For example, teachers of children in the United States of America wrote this date….

In an unmoored life like mine, sleep and hunger and work arrange themselves to suit themselves, without consulting me..

The secret to success in any human endeavor is total concentration..

The biggest truth to face now - what is probably making me unfunny now for the remainder of my life - is that I don't think people give a damn whethe….

Somebody realized, hey, students are printing dummy ads and dummy news stories, why don't they really print something. So there was the Shortridge Da….