Explore Quotes by Penn Jillette

My whole family is missing that sports gene. I hope I didn't screw that up by marrying a great golfer.

In my private life, I'm not around any drugs or alcohol.

Juggling is very, very straightforward; very, very black and white; you're manipulating objects, not people. And that's always appealed to me.

In reality, many people let go of religion later in life.

My parents were teetotalers and my grandparents were - it's all the way back. It's New English puritanical tradition.

Modern American magic, late 20th century magic, is tremendously disrespectful of the audience.

Jay-Z, he knows precisely who he's going for - 14-year-old white suburban girls.

If you want to talk about magic, the stuff that blows me away is the stuff that's done close up.

Mentally ill people come from all belief systems.

I've never revved my car at a light for an attractive woman or an auto-rival, not even as a joke.

Magic is the Special Olympics of entertainment.

It is really funny to see people that you know acting unpleasantly just because there are TV cameras on.

It's only the losers named Dave that think having an unusual name is bad, and who cares what they think. They're named Dave.

If you like the stuff I do, my chances of liking you go up.

If you want to turn out an atheist child, unconditional love constantly is a good way to do it.

If I were trying to avoid embarrassment, I wouldn't have stumbled my way through 'Dancing with the Stars.'

I've never had a drink of alcohol or any drug in my life.

If there are two things Penn & Teller stand for, it's the truth & lying, although not necessarily in that order.

I'm an amazing mama's boy.

I'm always surprised when the corporate world does stupid things, because they're often not very stupid in hindsight.

I've been fired from a situational comedy with a script they wrote specifically for me because of my voice.