But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It's like anythin….

You can only do two things with your life: give it away or throw it away..

Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin..

Star Wars Episode Three (And One Quarter): Revenge Of The Hicks.

My only goal is to make you laugh, not tell you the truth..

If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it's being true to their nature... that's what takes a long time to….

I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine..

I have had a front row seat to observe Darren's success over the last few years and never fully knew the keys to his achievement. He has unselfishly ….

The bulk of my fans are my age, and I'm aging at the same rate they are. That makes me relevant. They like hearing what I have to say. I work hard at….

I quit smoking cigarettes and with the $70 a month I am saving not smoking cigarettes I'm smoking $700 worth of cigars..

I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be ther….

You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out..

The next time you have a thought... let it go..

There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then….

From the very beginning I started with a beer and a cigarette because I couldn't figure out what to do with my hands. So usually I have a beer and ci….

I don't even plan things until later, so no I got no plans..

Barbara was actually Jeff Foxworthy's interior designer when we first met. So, not only was Jeff responsible for my success in my career, he also int….

I don't have a specific plan except for as long as people want to listen to me talk, I'm going to keep talking. I can't imagine a life without doing ….

I only like the live audience. I don't even like to do standup where it's being filmed. Because it affects the way the audience responds to what you ….

Apparently I ain't the only cat on the block digs cheetos..

I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn't care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to….