I have always tried to use humor to "help ever" and "hurt never," for I find that to laugh is like swallowing a secret that Santa Claus farted.
We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't … - David Cross
We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't …
- David Cross
The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country. - David Cross
The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.
I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him. - David Cross
I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him.
I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women. No? That one, you don't belie… - David Cross
I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women. No? That one, you don't belie…
The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny! - David Cross
The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!
I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with. - David Cross
I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with.
In New York, you are constantly faced with this very urgent decision that you have to make, about every twenty minutes...you have to decide, immediat… - David Cross
In New York, you are constantly faced with this very urgent decision that you have to make, about every twenty minutes...you have to decide, immediat…
I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I kn… - David Cross
I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I kn…
I recently attended a pro-drug rally... in my basement. - David Cross
I recently attended a pro-drug rally... in my basement.
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