BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.
Interpretation
This quote humorously defines a beggar not just as someone who is poor, but as someone dependent on friends for help.
Ambrose Bierce's definition of a beggar cleverly plays with the traditional understanding of the term. He implies that the act of begging is not merely about financial necessity, but rather about the reliance on friends and social connections, suggesting a humorous critique of social dependence and the nature of friendship.
In practice
This quote could be used in a speech about the value of friendship and mutual support.
PALM, n. A species of tree . . . of which the familiar "itching palm" ("Palma hominis") is most widely distributed . . . . This noble vegetable exudes a kind of invisible gum, which may be detected by applying to the bark a piece of gold or silver.
Human nature is pretty well balanced; for every lacking virtue there is a rough substitute that will serve at a pinch--as cunning is the wisdom of the unwise, and ferocity the courage of the coward.
Indigestion: A disease which the patient and his friends frequently mistake for deep religious conviction and concern for the salvation of mankind. As the simple Red Man of the Western Wild put it, with, it must be confessed, a certain force: 'Plenty well, no pray; big belly ache, heap God.'
Disobey n:To celebrate with an appropriate ceremony the maturity of a command
NOUMENON, n. That which exists, as distinguished from that which merely seems to exist, the latter being a phenomenon. The noumenon is a bit difficult to locate; it can be apprehended only by a process of reasoning - which is a phenomenon.
PARDON, v. To remit a penalty and restore to the life of crime. To add to the lure of crime the temptation of ingratitude.
I've actually gone to the zoo and had monkeys shout to me from their cages, "I'm in here when you're walking around like that?"
You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.
Now, some people do this for shock value. Shock is just another uptown word for surprise. Granted it has a different quality to it, but a joke is about surprising someone. I'm a great believer in context. You can joke about anything. I do like finding out where the line is drawn, deliberately crossing it and bringing some of them with me across the line, and having them be happy that I did.
I do not often laugh, sir, as you may perceive by the air of my countenance; but nevertheless, I retain the privilege of laughing when I please.
There are very few moments in a man's existence when he experiences so much ludicrous distress, or meets with so little charitable commiseration, as when he is in pursuit of his own hat.
When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and fools.
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