If you have the guts to be yourself, other people'll pay your price.
Having children is something we think we ought to do because our parents did it, but when it is over the children are just other members of the human race, rather disappointingly.
Interpretation
What this quote means
This quote reflects the ambivalence surrounding parenthood and the realization that children, while significant, are ultimately individuals in a larger society.
John Updike's quote captures a cynical perspective on parenthood, suggesting that the decision to have children can feel more like a societal obligation than a fulfilling personal choice. It highlights the idea that, despite the hopes and expectations placed on children, they ultimately grow into individual members of society, which may not align with the romanticized vision many parents hold.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
In a discussion about societal pressures to start a family, this quote can highlight the complexities of such a decision.
More from John Updike
All quotes →Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of. _x000D_ _x000D_ Suspect each moment, for it is a thief, tiptoeing away with more than it brings.
Museums and bookstores should feel, I think, like vacant lots - places where the demands on us are our own demands, where the spirit can find exercise in unsupervised play.
But it is just two lovers, holding hands and in a hurry to reach their car, their locked hands a starfish leaping through the dark.
The reader knows the writer better than he knows himself; but the writer's physical presence is light from a star that has moved on.
To guarantee the individual maximum freedom within a social frame of minimal laws ensures - if not happiness - its hopeful pursuit.
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Each of us has a soul, but we forget to value it. We don't remember that we are creatures made in the image of God. We don't understand the great secrets hidden inside of us.
Religion teaches us that our lives here on earth are to be used for transformation.
Religion increasingly is tending to degenerate into a decent formula wherewith to embellish a comfortable life.
Heroes who shed their blood and lost their lives! You are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and Mehmets to us where they lie side by side here in this country of ours. You, the mothers, who sent their sons from far away countries wipe away your tears; your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land they have become our sons as well.
I used to analyze myself down to the last thread, used to compare myself with others, recalled all the smallest glances, smiles and words of those to whom I’d tried to be frank, interpreted everything in a bad light, laughed viciously at my attempts ‘to be like the rest’ –and suddenly, in the midst of my laughing, I’d give way to sadness, fall into ludicrous despondency and once again start the whole process all over again – in short, I went round and round like a squirrel on a wheel.