As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, "Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete."
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It's in the lease. - Bob Hope
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It's in the lease.
- Bob Hope
Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots. - Bob Hope
Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
I like a President who tells jokes instead of appointing them. - Bob Hope
I like a President who tells jokes instead of appointing them.
You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up. - Bob Hope
You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
I have too much money invested in sweaters. - Bob Hope
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They're still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens. - Bob Hope
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They're still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
There was nothing subtle about our landing. The pilot just pointed the nose at the ground and let her rip. - Bob Hope
There was nothing subtle about our landing. The pilot just pointed the nose at the ground and let her rip.
We're on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It's a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf. - Bob Hope
We're on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It's a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
It flies so high, I swear I heard the organs playing. - Bob Hope
It flies so high, I swear I heard the organs playing.
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