It is in books, poems, paintings which often give us the confidence to take seriously feelings in ourselves that we might otherwise never have thought to acknowledge.
Alain De BottonRead
We wanted to test each other's capacity for survival: only if we had tried in vain to destroy one another would we know we were safe.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Understanding the limits of relationships often involves testing boundaries to ensure safety and trust.
This quote by Alain De Botton reflects the complexity of human relationships, suggesting that true safety can only be established once individuals have confronted each other in a way that tests their limits. By exploring the darker aspects of interaction and survival instincts, people can cultivate a deeper understanding and trust, ensuring that their bond is resilient and secure against potential threats.
Themes
SurvivalRelationshipsTrustTesting LimitsSafety
In practice
Example use cases
In a discussion about the dynamics of challenging relationships.
More from Alain De Botton
All quotes →Taking architecture seriously therefore makes some singular and strenuous demands upon us...It means conceding that we are inconveniently vulnerable to the colour of our wallpaper and that our sense of purpose may be derailed by an unfortunate bedspread
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The more closely we analyze what we consider 'sexy,' the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.
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Good books put a finger on emotions that are deeply our own - but that we could never have described on our own.
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The challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone.
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It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless hopes dampened through immersive dousings in the darkness which religions have explored. This is a particular priority for secular Americans, perhaps the most anxious and disappointed people on earth, for their nation infuses them with the most extreme hopes about what they may be able to achieve in their working lives and relationships.
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