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He knew it was possible for shame to be nursed and doctored like an illness, if you wanted to keep it separate from the rest of your life, but that didn't mean there'd be any way to keep from knowing it was there.
Richard Yates
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Interpretation

What this quote means

Shame can be treated as an illness, but it cannot be completely ignored or separated from one's life.

In this quote, Richard Yates explores the concept of shame as a pervasive emotion that individuals often try to manage or isolate from their overall existence. He suggests that while it is possible to compartmentalize shame and treat it as something separate, the reality is that acknowledgment of its presence is unavoidable, hinting at the complexities of human emotional experiences and the deep impact they have on life.

Themes

ShameEmotionAcknowledgmentLifePhilosophy

In practice

Example use cases

During a therapy session, one might reference this quote to discuss the complexities of dealing with shame.

More from Richard Yates

Know what we did, Lucy? You and me? We spent our whole lives yearning. Isn't that the God damndest thing?
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She was calm and quiet now with knowing what she had always known, what neither her parents nor Aunt Claire nor Frank nor anyone else had ever had to teach her: that if you wanted something to do something absolutely honest, something true, it always turned out to be a thing that had to be done alone.
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He found it so easy and so pleasant to cry that he didn’t try to stop for a while, until he realized he was forcing his sobs a little, exaggerating their depth with unnecessary shudders. … The whole point of crying is to quit before you coined it up. The whole point of grief itself was to cut it out while it was still honest, while it still meant something. Because the thing was so easily corrupted
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Do you know what the definition of insane is? Yes. It’s the inability to relate to another human being. It’s the inability to love.
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It's a disease. Nobody thinks or feels or cares any more; nobody gets excited or believes in anything except their own comfortable little God damn mediocrity.
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She just happened to feel like it. Wasn’t that after all, the only reason there was? Had she ever had a less selfish, more complicated reason for doing anything in her life?
Richard YatesRead

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