It is in books, poems, paintings which often give us the confidence to take seriously feelings in ourselves that we might otherwise never have thought to acknowledge.
Sometimes I say to people, 'Do you think you're easy to live with?' People who are single. And the ones who say, 'Yeah, yeah, I'm pretty easy to live with; it's just a question of finding the right person,' massive alarm bell rings in my mind.
Interpretation
What this quote means
The quote reflects on self-awareness in relationships, suggesting that those who claim to be easy to live with may lack insight into their own personalities.
Alain De Botton's quote delves into the importance of self-reflection in the context of relationships. It highlights the idea that individuals who are single and believe they are easy to live with may overlook personal challenges that could hinder relationship dynamics. By emphasizing the need for self-awareness and honesty, the quote serves as a reminder that finding the right partner also involves understanding one's own strengths and flaws.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
During a relationship workshop discussion to emphasize the importance of introspection before dating.
More from Alain De Botton
All quotes βTaking architecture seriously therefore makes some singular and strenuous demands upon us...It means conceding that we are inconveniently vulnerable to the colour of our wallpaper and that our sense of purpose may be derailed by an unfortunate bedspread
The more closely we analyze what we consider 'sexy,' the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.
Good books put a finger on emotions that are deeply our own - but that we could never have described on our own.
The challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone.
It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless hopes dampened through immersive dousings in the darkness which religions have explored. This is a particular priority for secular Americans, perhaps the most anxious and disappointed people on earth, for their nation infuses them with the most extreme hopes about what they may be able to achieve in their working lives and relationships.
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If you're black, you got to look at America a little bit different. You got to look at America like the uncle who paid for you to go to college, but who molested you.
Until you have become really, in actual fact, as brother to everyone, brotherhood will not come to pass.
If our bodies are sick, we seek to heal them. We do not give up. The same thing should be true of our marriages.
Then a strange thing happened. She turned to him and smiled, and as he saw her smile every rag of anger and hurt vanity dropped from him β as though his very moods were but the outer ripples of her own, as though emotion rose no longer in his breast unless she saw fit to pull an omnipotent controlling thread.
Powerful is our need to be known, really known by ourselves and others, even if only for a moment.