It is in books, poems, paintings which often give us the confidence to take seriously feelings in ourselves that we might otherwise never have thought to acknowledge.
Alain De BottonRead
We each appear to hold within ourselves a range of divergent views as to our native qualities.. And amid such uncertainty, we typically turn to the wider world to settle the question of our significance.. we seem beholden to affections of others to endure ourselves.
Interpretation
What this quote means
The quote reflects on the uncertainty of self-perception and the need for external validation to affirm our significance.
Alain De Botton discusses the complex nature of self-identity and the internal conflicts we face regarding our inherent qualities. He suggests that in an attempt to understand our own worth, we often seek reassurance from the opinions and affections of others, indicating a dependence on external validation to construct our sense of self and significance in the world.
Themes
Self-PerceptionValidationIdentitySignificancePhilosophy
In practice
Example use cases
In a speech about self-esteem, one might reference this quote to highlight the importance of understanding inner worth.
More from Alain De Botton
All quotes →Taking architecture seriously therefore makes some singular and strenuous demands upon us...It means conceding that we are inconveniently vulnerable to the colour of our wallpaper and that our sense of purpose may be derailed by an unfortunate bedspread
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The more closely we analyze what we consider 'sexy,' the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.
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Good books put a finger on emotions that are deeply our own - but that we could never have described on our own.
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The challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone.
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It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless hopes dampened through immersive dousings in the darkness which religions have explored. This is a particular priority for secular Americans, perhaps the most anxious and disappointed people on earth, for their nation infuses them with the most extreme hopes about what they may be able to achieve in their working lives and relationships.
Alain De BottonRead
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