If you're a guy, you have absolutely no idea what's going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here's what you know: you know when you're getting laid, and you know when it's all over. Those are the only two things you're aware of.
Don’t do your best, do my best. - Adam Carolla
Don’t do your best, do my best.
- Adam Carolla
If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place. - Adam Carolla
If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity. - Adam Carolla
People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.
I am not a good cue card reader. - Adam Carolla
I am not a good cue card reader.
Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay. - Adam Carolla
Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick u… - Adam Carolla
The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick u…
No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear. - Adam Carolla
No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.
Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck. - Adam Carolla
Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus… - Adam Carolla
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus…
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