Quotes on Discworld

The shortest unit of time in the multiverse is the New York Second, defined as the period of time between the traffic lights turning green and the cab behind you honking.

Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

Chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, because it is better organized.

In ancient times cats were worshiped as gods; they have not forgotten this.

'Don't think of it as dying,' said Death. 'Just think of it as leaving early to avoid the rush.'

It's still magic even if you know how it's done.

Did I do anything last night that suggested I was sane?

The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it's as though you always get in ten minutes after the big picture has started, and no-one will tell you the plot, so you have to work it out all yourself from the clues.

Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH,' the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.

You need to believe in things that aren't true. How else can they become?

Asking someone to repeat a phrase you'd not only heard very clearly but were also exceedingly angry about was around Defcon II in the lexicon of squabble.

The thing is, 'Discworld' had been going on for a very long time, and I've written children's books as well. Usually when people have a really big series they franchise it, which I thought is a bit of a no-no, so I thought what I'd do is I'd franchise it to myself.

'Discworld' is taking something that you know is ridiculous and treating it as if it is serious, to see if something interesting happens when you do so.

Genius is always allowed some leeway, once the hammer has been pried from its hands and the blood has been cleaned up.

The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.

Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.

In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can.

Five exclamation marks: the sure sign of an insane mind.