Quotes on Funny Money

If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem.

The glow of one warm thought is to me worth more than money.

If you would know the value of money, go and try to borrow some.

I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.

Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.

Somebody said to me, 'But the Beatles were anti-materialistic.' That's a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, 'Now, let's write a swimming pool.'

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.

Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

This planet has — or rather had — a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time.

It is good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good too, to check up once in a while and make sure you haven't lost the things money can't buy.

Money without brains is always dangerous.

Never spend your money before you have earned it.

Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery.

Money is like manure; it's not worth a thing unless it's spread around encouraging young things to grow.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

You can be young without money but you can't be old without it.

What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.

When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.