Quotes on Funny

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.

If you associate enough with older people who do enjoy their lives, who are not stored away in any golden ghettos, you will gain a sense of continuity and of the possibility for a full life.

It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.

Man is an animal that makes bargains: no other animal does this - no dog exchanges bones with another.

The rate at which a person can mature is directly proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate.

I know a way to stay friends forever, There's really nothing to it, I tell you what to do, And you do it.

I am who I am and I say what I think. I'm not putting a face on for the record.

Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes.

I have an idea that the phrase weaker sex was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm.

Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators.

When will all the rhetorical questions end?

Baloney is flattery laid on so thick it cannot be true, and blarney is flattery so thin we love it.

We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.

Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

I was deeply unhappy, but I didn't know it because I was so happy all the time.

A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

The inner nature of man is the province of Music.

The execs don't care what color you are. They care about how much money you make. Hollywood is not really black or white. It's green.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Life is as tedious as twice-told tale, vexing the dull ear of a drowsy man.