I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?.

Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series..

The help (in Japan) is very polite. They bow so much, you don't know which end to talk to..

Today's ballroom dances like the swim, the frug, the chicken and the monkey are really nervous disorders set to music..

It was a typically British birth... I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward... I came out in sympathy..

Golf's really fun in Japan because of the women caddies. ... I saw one guy start out playing alone with his caddie. By the 9th hole they were engaged….

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him..

America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan - Go for the Gold..

Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don't ….

Arnold Palmer is the biggest crowd pleaser since the invention of the portable sanitary facility..

I don't know what people have against Jimmy Carter. He's done nothing..

I can't give up Golf, I've got too many sweaters..

I don't know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House..

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake..

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people..

Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for b….

Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend's house during a power failure..

I need money. I have a staff of 30, and four houses, never mind the government, to support..

Having so many gold courses so close together was ideal for me. With my slice I could enjoy three or four golf courses at the same time..

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do….

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies.