It is in books, poems, paintings which often give us the confidence to take seriously feelings in ourselves that we might otherwise never have thought to acknowledge.
Alain De BottonRead
To a shameful extent, the charm of marriage boils down to how unpleasant it is to be alone.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Marriage often appeals to individuals because the alternative, being alone, can feel deeply unappealing.
Alain De Botton suggests that the allure of marriage is significantly tied to the discomfort of loneliness. This indicates that many people may enter into marital unions not just for love or companionship, but also as a way to escape the inherent difficulties of being single, implying that the fears of solitude can drive individuals toward partnership.
Themes
MarriageLonelinessRelationshipsLoveCompanionship
In practice
Example use cases
During a wedding toast, to highlight the importance of companionship.
More from Alain De Botton
All quotes βTaking architecture seriously therefore makes some singular and strenuous demands upon us...It means conceding that we are inconveniently vulnerable to the colour of our wallpaper and that our sense of purpose may be derailed by an unfortunate bedspread
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The more closely we analyze what we consider 'sexy,' the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.
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Good books put a finger on emotions that are deeply our own - but that we could never have described on our own.
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The challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone.
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It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless hopes dampened through immersive dousings in the darkness which religions have explored. This is a particular priority for secular Americans, perhaps the most anxious and disappointed people on earth, for their nation infuses them with the most extreme hopes about what they may be able to achieve in their working lives and relationships.
Alain De BottonRead
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