Quotes on Humorous

The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.

Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.

Young lawyers attend the courts, not because they have business there, but because they have no business.

Try to learn something about everything and everything about something.

Well, that's your opinion, isn't it? And I'm not about to waste my time trying to change it.

The only real laughter comes from despair.

And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!

I have neither the scholar's melancholy, which is emulation; nor the musician's, which is fantastical; nor the courtier's, which is proud; not the soldier's which is ambitious; nor the lawyer's, which is politic; nor the lady's, which is nice; nor the lover's, which is all these: but it is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, which, by often rumination, wraps me in a most humorous sadness.

Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!

In America any boy may become President, and I suppose it's just one of the risks he takes.

Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs.

But it is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, which, by often rumination, wraps me in the most humorous sadness.

No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.

Show me a young Conservative and I'll show you someone with no heart. Show me an old Liberal and I'll show you someone with no brains.

The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.

Hell is a half-filled auditorium.

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.