Quotes on Political Jokes

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.

How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin.

Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators.

Bad officials are the ones elected by good citizens who do not vote.

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

I don't approve of political jokes; I have seen too many of them get elected.

I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help."

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

A politician needs the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen.