Humourists lead... an existence of jumpiness and apprehension. They sit on the edge of the chair of Literature. In the house of Life they have the fe….

But those rare souls whose spirit gets magically into the hearts of men, leave behind them something more real and warmly personal than bodily presen….

If a playwright tried to see eye to eye with everybody, he would get the worst case of strabismus since Hannibal lost an eye trying to count his nine….

A drawing is always dragged down to the level of its caption..

But what is all this fear of and opposition to Oblivion? What is the matter with the soft Darkness, the Dreamless Sleep?.

A wet dog is lovingest..

Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!.

Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility..

Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision..

Humor and pathos, tears and laughter are, in the highest expression of human character and achievement, inseparable..

When man gives up on reforming and inspiring society he also gives up his freedom..

The pounding of the cylinders increased: ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa..

Surely no other American institution is so bound around and tightened up by rules, strictures, adages, and superstitions as the Broadway theatre..

My grandmother lived the latter years of her life in the horrible suspicion that electricity was dripping invisibly all over the house. It leaked, sh….

In an extensive reading of recent books by psychologists, psychoanalysts, psychiatrists, and inspirationalists, I have discovered that they all suffe….

If you wonder which is the stronger sex, watch which one twists the other around her little finger..

I never had a dog that showed a human fear of death. Death, to a dog, is the final unavoidable compulsion, the least ineluctable scent on a fearsome ….

Comedy has to be done en clair. You can't blunt the edge of wit or the point of satire with obscurity. Try to imagine a famous witty saying that is n….

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?.

Mutual suspicions of mental inadequacy are common during the first year of any marriage..

The unicorn is a mythical beast..