It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them..

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun..

You probably think that being a guest in your aunt's house I would hesitate to butter you all over the front lawn and dance on the fragments in hobna….

It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. H….

Employers are like horses — they require management..

There are three things in the world that he held in the smallest esteem - slugs, poets and caddies with hiccups..

She looked away. Her attitude seemed to suggest that she had finished with him, and would be obliged if somebody would come and sweep him up..

But everything is relative, Bertie... You, for instance, are my relative, and I am your relative..

I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose..

No novelists any good except me. Sovietski -- yah! Nastikoff -- bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P. G. Wodehouse ….

I attribute my whole success in life to a rigid observance of the fundamental rule - Never have yourself tattooed with any woman's name, not even her….

A certain critic -- for such men, I regret to say, do exist -- made the nasty remark about my last novel that it contained 'all the old Wodehouse cha….

[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments..

Love is a delicate plant that needs constant tending and nurturing, and this cannot be done by snorting at the adored object like a gas explosion and….

He groaned slightly and winced like Prometheus watching his vulture dropping in for lunch..

When Cynthia smiles, said young Bingo, the skies are blue; the world takes on a roseate hue; birds in the garden trill and sing, and Joy is king of e….

Mike nodded. A sombre nod. The nod Napoleon might have given if somebody had met him in 1812 and said, "So, you're back from Moscow, eh?.

I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinsk….

One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hours´ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a ma….

It was a nasty look. It made me feel as if I were something the dog had brought in and intended to bury later on, when he had time..

...what I feel we ought to do at this juncture is to dash off somewhere where it's quiet and there aren't so many housesdancing the 'Blue Danube' and….