Fashionably amusing table manners are a matter of breaking the right rule at the right time..

One nice thing about the Third World, you don't have to fasten your seat belt. (Or stop smoking. Or cut down on saturated fats.) It takes a lot off y….

I didn't realize what fun it was [ been a reporter]..

Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us..

I think in the [Bill] Clinton era, if people hadn't been spending vast amounts of time attacking Clinton, they would have found that they had essenti….

After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply s….

Greatest generation came through some stuff that we can't even imagine - the Depression, World War I - and all they wanted after that was a breather ….

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly..

All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done..

Wearing a hat implies that you are bald if you are a man and that your hair is dirty if you are a woman..

Any person who has spent time outdoors actually doing something, such as hunting and fishing as opposed to standing there with a doobie in his mouth,….

Good manners are a combination of intelligence, education, taste and style mixed together so that you don't need any of those things..

Who, other than a crazy person, does anything besides hang up on a robo-call? Any call, any person, anywhere, under any circumstances..

People love to be told what they know already. It's not so much that what they say is wrong, though Ann Coulter does seem to be completely crazy..

That is the really great thing about being an adult male, once you get married and have children the whole decision-making process is taken out of yo….

Think about last time you were broke ... now how well did it go with spending your way out of it? Did that work?.

If you say a modern celebrity is an adulterer, a pervert and a drug addict, all it means is that you've read his autobiography..

To really enjoy drugs you've got to want to get out of where you are. But there are some wheres that are harder to get out of than others. This is th….

Then there was LSD, which was supposed to make you think you could fly. I remember it made you think you couldn't stand up, and mostly it was right..

There's such a self-conscious balance that goes into television. Also, these are not people that think things through..

We like to pile language on language. Hunter [ S. Thompson] was an influence on me, no doubt about it..