Regard as your most faithful friends, not those who praise everything you say or do, but those who criticize your mistakes.
IsocratesRead
Make no man your friend before inquiring how he has used his former friends; for you must expect him to treat you as he has treated them. Be slow to give your friendship, but when you have given it, strive to make it lasting; for it is as reprehensible to make many changes in one's associates as to have no friends at all. Neither test your friends to your own injury nor be willing to forego a test of your companions.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Carefully consider how someone has treated their previous friends before trusting them.
This quote by Isocrates emphasizes the importance of understanding a person's history with their past friendships before entering into a new friendship. It suggests that people's behavior towards others is a strong indicator of how they will behave towards you, highlighting the need for caution and thoughtfulness in forming new relationships. Furthermore, once a friendship is established, it should be nurtured and maintained, as frequent changes in associates can be detrimental.
Themes
FriendshipTrustRelationshipsCautionHistory
In practice
Example use cases
In a speech about the value of friendship, one might quote Isocrates to highlight the importance of trust.
More from Isocrates
All quotes →But I marvel when I observe these men setting themselves up as instructors of youth who cannot see that they are applying the analogy of an art with hard and fast rules to a creative process
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Spend your leisure time in cultivating an ear attentive to discourse, for in this way you will find that you learn with ease what others have found out with difficulty.
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And let no one suppose that I claim that just living can be taught for, in a word, I hold that there does not exist an art of the kind which can implant sobriety and justice into depraved natures. Nevertheless, I do think that the study of political discourse can help more than any other thing to stimulate and form such qualities of character
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It is more important to know where you are going than to get there quickly. Do not mistake activity for achievement. Remember that there is nothing stable in human affairs, therefore avoid undue elation in prosperity or undue depression in adversity.
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Of all our possessions, wisdom alone is immortal.
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