Don't we forgive everything of a lover? We forgive selfishness, desire, guile. As long as we are the motive for it...There are some European words you can never translate properly into another language.
Women want everything of a lover. And too often I would sink below the surface. So armies disappear under sand. And there was her fear of her husband, her belief in her honour, my old desire for self-sufficiency, my disappearances, her suspicions of me, my disbelief that she loved me. The paranoia and claustrophobia of hidden love.
Interpretation
What this quote means
The quote reflects the complexity and fears present in intimate relationships, highlighting desires, doubts, and the struggles of love.
In this quote, Michael Ondaatje explores the tumultuous emotions that arise in romantic relationships, particularly the fears and insecurities related to love and trust. The imagery of armies disappearing under sand symbolizes the feelings of disappearing or being overwhelmed under pressures of love, while also touching on themes of suspicion, self-sufficiency, and the inner conflicts that partners may experience when navigating their feelings for one another. This reflection on the paradoxes of love underscores the weight of expectations and the crumbling foundations that often accompany the pursuit of deep connections.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
Sharing this quote in a discussion about the intricacies of love in a relationship class.
More from Michael Ondaatje
All quotes →When we are young we do not look into mirrors. It is when we are old, concerned with our name, our legend, what our lives will mean to the future. We become vain with the names we own, our claims to have been the first eyes, the strongest army, the cleverest merchant. It is when he is old that Narcissus wants a graven image of himself.
Water is the exile, carried back in cans and flasks, the ghost between your hands and your mouth.
You must talk to me, Caravaggio. Or am I just a book? Something to be read, some creature to be tempted out of a loch and shot full of morphine, full of corridors, lies, loose vegetation, pockets of stones.
You don't want to write your own opinion, you don't want to just represent yourself, but represent yourself through someone else.
A man in a desert can hold absence in his cupped hands, knowing it is something that feeds him more than water.
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Nothing flatters a man as much as the happiness of his wife; he is always proud of himself as the source of it.
God calls all of his children to the table. We can disagree and even say a lot of hateful things, but what we can't do in good conscience is leave the table. Or demand that someone else not be at the table.
I always felt like I was a freak when I was growing up and that there was something wrong with me because I couldn't fit in anywhere.
I certainly should have,' he agrees, smiling and thinking what an absurd and universally-accepted bit of nonsense it is, that your best friends must necessarily be the ones who best understand you. As if there weren't far too much understanding in the world already; above all, that understanding between lovers, celebrated in song and story, which is actually such torture that no two of them can bear it without frequent separations or fights.
I like people and I like them to like me, but I wear my heart where God put it, on the inside.
There's a lot of me in it. But the character is more egotistical. I'm also egotistical, but not the way the character is. This guy is successful, he has everything, but his wife has left him. The most important value - love - is missing. What is wrong with this institution called 'marriage'? What is wrong with this institution called 'the pursuit of happiness'?