I had an alarm, I had nerve gas, I had a yogurt. What more could anyone want?.

Good thing he's dead," Lula said, "or that would have hurt like the devil..

I'd slept with Ranger! Not sexually, of course. But I'd been in his bed. And then there was the evil shower gel. "It was all because of the shower ge….

There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls..

My mother had been slicing up the chicken. She took a drumstick and dropped it on the floor. She kicked it around a little, picked it up and put it o….

No one expected a first year engineering student to build the perfect bridge..

Wondering where Ranger was now, when I needed him. Why wasn’t he here, insisting on locking me up in a safe house? Now that my hamster’s cage was cle….

You deserved to get run over. And besides, I barely tapped you. The only reason you broke your leg was because you panicked and tripped over your own….

Aren't you something," Grandma said. "I never saw a midget up close." "Little person," Briggs said. "And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, e….

Lula's borderline too much of a good thing in lots of ways. It isn't exactly that Lula is fat; it's more that she's too short for her weight and her ….

I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble..

We were discussing a grisly double murder and Rodriguez was telling us all this in the same sort of conversational tone a person might use to pass on….

Do you have someone watching her house?” (Stephanie) “That kind of surveillance only happens in the movies. We’re so underbudgeted we’re one step awa….

I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying..

Babe, you've destroyed a car, burned down two buildings, stapled a guy's nuts, and you have sixteen stitches in your leg. Take a night off. Have a gl….

Here's a basic difference between Morelli and me. My first thought was always of cake. His first thought was always of sex. Don't get me wrong. I lik….

Are you afraid of me? Uh... yes.' The smile stayed fixed in place. 'You should be. You locked me in a refrigerator truck with three dead people. Soon….

Respect and love your readers. Write for the reader..

I'd spent a night with Ranger a while ago, and I knew what happened when he was encouraged. Ranger knew how to make a woman want him. Ranger was magi….

What's this outfit? You can't afford clothes? Are you wearing other peoples?" Helen Plum.

Morelli grabbed the front of my shirt, pulled me to him, and kissed me. It was a great kiss, but I didn't know what the heck it meant. It seemed to m….