I like to do my principal research in bars, where people are more likely to tell the truth or, at least, lie less convincingly than they do in briefi….

Politicians are always interested in people. Not that this is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs..

The sport of skiing consists of wearing three thousand dollars worth of clothes and equipment and driving two hundred miles in the snow in order to s….

There's no telling what might have happened to our defense budget if Saddam Hussein hadn't invaded Kuwait that August and set everyone gearing up for….

This going on and on about how terrible a carbon-based economy is, these people are full of crap. They don't know what they're talking about. Their m….

The larger the German body, the smaller the German bathing suit and the louder the German voice issuing German demands and German orders to everybody….

Political stuff is all about his [Hunter S. Thompson] reaction to a situation. And my stuff is much more externally driven..

The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop..

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them..

When politics are used to allocate resources, the resources all end up being allocated to politics..

Feminism is the result of a few ignorant and literal-minded women letting the cat out of the bag about which is the superior sex. Once women made it ….

Some people are better imagined in one's bed than found there in the morning..

[Michael] Moore doesn't really use his sense of humor that much..

I like to take things that are boring-but-important and try to make them interesting. That was definitely what I was after with Eat The Rich..

If I do, I say so. That's the only way out of that. If there are three words that need to be used more in American journalism, commentary, politics, ….

I bought my first house because of Animal House..

Keeping house is as unpleasant and filthy as coal mining, and the pay's a lot worse..

There is a fine line in the Third World between half a dozen customs officials waiting for you to offer them a bribe and half a dozen customs officia….

I'm old enough to remember when the air over American cities was a lot dirtier than it is now..

Intelligence collection has been given an additional bureaucracy to correct the problems created by too much bureaucracy in intelligence collection..

There aren't many political humorists. Dave Barry is excellent, but he doesn't do it much..