It is a law of governance that democracies have to spend themselves dizzy. Citizens of democracies can, after all, tell their government to give them….

There are no kinder or better people in the world than those who listen to you when you are 18..

Poverty can't be eliminated by punishing people who've escaped poverty..

Something that comes to us, some gym shoe that comes to us as a result of child labor from a brutal dictatorship, where people do not have basic free….

There is parody, when you make fun of people who are smarter than you; satire, when you make fun of people who are richer than you; and burlesque, wh….

I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes..

Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and he will be certain that you….

As a libertarian I believe we should have a federal government simple and circumscribed enough to be run by an average, dull, normal American. With G….

In Washington journalists can afford to live almost as well as people who work for a living..

Well the planet I've got a chance to visit is Earth, and Earth's principal features are chaos and war. I think I'd be a fool to spend years here and ….

I have three children and three dogs. You put them in a Prius, you know? People who have a Prius obviously have no life! No wife, no kids, no pets - ….

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreig….

Cats are to dogs what modern people are to the people we used to have. Cats are slimmer, cleaner, more attractive, disloyal, and lazy. It's easy to u….

Fortunately, I'm married to someone who's a pretty excellent parent!.

We won't dispassionately investigate or rationally debate which drugs do what damage and whether or how much of that damage is the result of criminal….

[Friedrich] Hayek is not protesting that things like child labor and stuff are good. He's just trying to show that when government undertakes to make….

A world government run by the UN will be like getting an old, purblind, half-deaf substitute teacher..

The real truth about children is they don't speak the language very well. They're physically uncoordinated. And they are ignorant of our elaborate id….

I think Michael O'Donoghue felt he'd said what he wanted to say. In fact, nobody thought we could spin it out long enough to make a book..

Off they go on this sort of camping trip to Iwo Jima, where they're taken around and shown where all the battles took place. It's very moving. Disgus….

The Soviet constitution guarantees everyone a job. A pretty scary idea, I'd say..