Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it's the thing that's really preventing us from taking flight.
When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Setting boundaries is crucial for healthy relationships; failing to do so leads to feelings of being mistreated.
Brené Brown emphasizes the importance of establishing boundaries in interpersonal relationships. When we neglect to set limits and fail to hold others accountable for their actions, it can lead to feelings of being taken advantage of, mistreated, or even resentful. Instead of addressing unacceptable behaviors, we may resort to attacking the person's character, which can cause more harm than good. This quote highlights the need for clear communication and mutual respect in our connections with others.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
In a workshop on healthy relationships, this quote can be used to illustrate the importance of setting boundaries.
More from Bren Brown
All quotes →Social media has given us this idea that we should all have a posse of friends when in reality, if we have one or two really good friends, we are lucky.
What we know matters but who we are matters more.
Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.
Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.
Nostalgia is also a dangerous form of comparison. Think about how often we compare our lives to a memory that nostalgia has so completely edited that it never really existed.
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There's something undeniable about the posture of a person trying not to acknowledge your existance
I shall commit my thoughts to paper, it is true; but that is a poor medium for the communication of feeling. I desire the company of a man who could sympathize with me, whose eyes would reply to mine.
Loads of my friends are lesbians, and it really annoys me that gay people aren't allowed to get married in most parts of America. I'd go on a march for gay rights any time.
All advocacy is, at its core, an exercise in empathy.
But the years came and went without bringing the careless boy; and when they met again Wendy was a married woman, and Peter was no more to her than a little dust in the box in which she had kept her toys.
Was it all put into words, or did both understand that they had the same thing at heart and in their minds, so that there was no need to speak of it aloud, and better not to speak of it?