The very ingredients that nurture love - mutuality, reciprocity, protection, worry, responsibility for the other - are sometimes the very ingredients that stifle desire.
Esther PerelRead
Eroticism thrives in the space between the self and the other.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Eroticism is enhanced by the dynamic interaction between oneself and another person.
Esther Perel's quote suggests that eroticism is not simply about physical attraction or sexual activity, but rather it flourishes in the interplay and tension between two people. This interplay involves a sense of mystery, emotional distance, and a desire for connection that can spark passion and desire in relationships.
Themes
EroticismRelationshipsSelfOtherDesire
In practice
Example use cases
During an intimate conversation at a couples' retreat.
More from Esther Perel
All quotes →Love is a vessel that contains both security and adventure, and commitment offers one of the great luxuries of life: time. Marriage is not the end of romance, it is the beginning.
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If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day you will end up looking for another person in order to reconnect with those lost parts.
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What is the relationship between love and desire? How do they relate, and how do they conflict? ... Therein lies the mystery of eroticism.
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Most of us will get turned on at night by the very same things that we will demonstrate against during the day - the erotic mind is not very politically correct.
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It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.
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