Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
Keep in mind that other people's actions can never 'make' you feel any certain way. Feelings are your warning indicators.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Our feelings are a reflection of our own perceptions rather than someone else's actions.
In this quote, Marshall B. Rosenberg emphasizes the importance of recognizing that our emotional responses are not solely determined by the actions of others. Instead, they serve as indicators that inform us about our thoughts, values, and unmet needs. By understanding this principle, we can take responsibility for our own feelings and responses, leading to healthier interactions and communication with others.
Themes
FeelingsEmotionsResponsibilityPerceptionsInteractions
In practice
Example use cases
During a workshop on emotional intelligence, this quote could be used to illustrate how to manage our reactions.
More from Marshall B. Rosenberg
All quotes βWhether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
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In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
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