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Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Interpretation

What this quote means

Judging others reflects our own opinions on their actions and character.

In this quote, Marshall B. Rosenberg highlights the inherent judgment involved in both praise and criticism. By evaluating someone's actions, we position ourselves as judges, which can create a power dynamic and influence the way we relate to each other. Rather than fostering understanding and compassion, this judgment may lead to conflict and division.

Themes

JudgmentEvaluationPraiseCriticismConsciousness

In practice

Example use cases

During a workshop on communication, this quote can be used to illustrate the impact of judgment on interpersonal relationships.

More from Marshall B. Rosenberg

Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
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In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
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The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
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You can't make your kids do anything. All you can do is make them wish they had. And then, they will make you wish you hadn't made them wish they had.
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