Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Using force can create more resistance instead of compliance.
Marshall B. Rosenberg's quote highlights the counterproductive nature of employing punitive measures to address behavior. Instead of fostering cooperation or compliance, the use of force often breeds resentment and defiance, suggesting that more compassionate approaches may yield better outcomes in changing behaviors.
Themes
ForceHostilityResistanceBehaviorPunishmentNonviolence
In practice
Example use cases
In a negotiation setting, this quote could be used to advocate for more empathetic and collaborative approaches.
More from Marshall B. Rosenberg
All quotes βWhether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
You can't make your kids do anything. All you can do is make them wish they had. And then, they will make you wish you hadn't made them wish they had.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
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