Everybody is afraid to touch the topic of religion, especially with the extreme muslims. It's such a touchy subject. You can attack any other religio….

This depravation of our nature is nothing else but the blotting of God's image in us..

I'll tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless!.

Our senses are always part of the process..

During job interviews, when they ask: 'What is your worst quality?', I always say: 'Flatulence'. That way I get my own office..

If I hadn't been told I was garbage, I wouldn't have learned how to show people I'm talented. And if everyone had always laughed at my jokes, I would….

I look hot and, most of all, skinny. I love the day after throwing up. I felt like a feather..

Never point at anything beige and call it cool..

You've got to tell your money what to do or it will leave..

Leadership must be demonstrated, not announced..

But possibly I am something more than I suppose myself to be..

To say a thing 'must be', is the very power that makes it..

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'.

Rehabilitate the germs that cause bad breath..

There are so many women out there relying on me to represent them..

You have to do what you fear, otherwise fear is in charge..

Eee-nee-mee-nee-my-nee-moe.

Bette Midler can say four-letter words and make you love it..

What could be worse than having to be seen resorting to your own life..

Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win..

Better to be screwed physically than financially..