If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough..

you will always love, and you will always be loved.

One does not laugh because one is happy; one is happy because one laughs..

That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?.

A serious and good philosophical work could be written consisting entirely of jokes..

The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are..

Of course, uh, the universe is gradually slowing down and, uh, will eventually collapse inwardly on itself, according to the laws of entropy when all….

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "Why the long face?". The horse replies: "I'm deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my exis….

I'm sort of like a post-modern vegetarian; I eat meat ironically..

I got ham but I'm not a Hamster.

The BBC did a survey of the top 50 things to do before we die. Not while we're still alive, before we die..

There are men so philosophical that they can see humor in their own toothaches. But there has never lived a man so philosophical that he could see th….

Giving up the illusion that you can predict the future is a very liberating moment. All you can do is give yourself the capacity to respond... the cr….

[W]ithout humour you cannot run a sweetie-shop, let alone a nation..

I have a rare form of body dysmorphia in which I absolutely can't stand how good I look..

I take the work seriously, just not myself in it..

I have nothing to declare except my genuis..

Every McDonald's commercial ends the same way: Prices and participation may vary. I wanna open a McDonald's and not participate in anything. I wanna ….

I think animal crackers make people think that all animals taste the same..

You can't finish the things you weren't supposed to start..

Je est un autre. (I is someone else)..