The Canteen Boy, the reason you feel bad for him and you can laugh is because he, and I guess a lot of my characters, they don't notice they're getti….

I don't want my kid to hear any of the albums that I've made..

I can't run a company... I can't even run my own life!.

It's just weird that out of nowhere God said, May the three best-looking guys in Hollywood have babies - Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt and me. It was bizarre….

Eat turkey all night long, 50 million Elvis fans can't be wrong..

I'm a big fan of money. I like it, I use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my refrigerator. I'd like to put more in that jar. That's ….

The idea of my kids being spoiled, I go to sleep thinking about it. I wake up thinking about. I'm trying to do the right thing. With the amount of mo….

On this lovely, lovely Hanukkah, drink your gin and tonica..

If a girl breaks up with me, I want her to just die, just be dead. Not 'cause I hate her so much as it's just easier for when my friends go, 'Hey, wh….

I still get very scared when I step in front of a live audience..

I'm not making every decision due to my children. But I do hope they never see some movies I'm doing. But I do want to do more family-friendly movies..

I'm pretty hot, right? Very hot, if I may say so myself. Don't you feel the sex I'm radiating?.

One night I couldn't sleep. It was like 2:00 in the morning. I was thinking, 'What can I do?' I'm watching TV. I'm like, 'Let me do something else.' ….

I still like some of the stuff, skateboarding. Just stupid things..

I don't laugh at me. I used to. I used to get the giggles when I'd see myself. But now, I see myself onscreen, and I sure don't laugh..

I've always liked older ladies, ever since my mother would have B'nai B'rith at our house..

I'm not comfortable being around too many people. I don't like being out in public too much. I don't like going to bars. I don't like doing celebrity….

I guess I was maybe in little league baseball as far as I wanted to be good at that. But school, I certainly wasn't the best at that. But comedy thin….

I wanted to make sure that I did one movie in my career that mothers hug me for..

I've got a hockey record, I took off my skate and tried to stab a guy, I'm the only person who ever tried that..

I'm not great at bedtime stories. Bedtime stories are supposed to put the kid to sleep. My kid gets riled up and then my wife has to come in and go, ….