If it's something I feel I can do alright, I like being in those, and some that I think Rob Schneider and David Spade would be funnier at than me, I ….

A lot of critics object to what I do, but I got into comedy to make people laugh, and I've always worked hard..

I've always just had troubles with my family because I'm psychotic. It had nothing to do with that..

I still like doing stand-up now, but it's not the same. It used to be that I was out there with five other comedians. Now I usually just do it alone..

Never seen my friends do more push-ups, trying to challenge Cruises' manhood. It was like, I can be strong, too!.

I was just a young guy who was excited to become a comedian and an actor and I just wanted to get to do what I got to do..

Bedtime stories were definitely a big part of my life because I was just so excited my father was talking to me..

Well I have a microphone and you don't so you will listen to every damn word I have to say!.

Mama says that, happiness is from magic rays of sunshine that come down when you're feeling blue..

I grew up cursing a lot. It felt natural. My parents told me to stop..

Sir one more comment like that and I will strangle you with my microphone wire!.

Paul Newman's half Jewishand Florence Henderson's half, tooPut them together,What a fine looking Jew!.

Me and Fred Wolf wrote the movie [ Grown Ups]. The whole idea was about putting together old friends that get to hang out for a weekend..

Comedy, such a lovely lady, she'll pick you up, you your feeling blue..

I'm in a mood, Dave. A bad mood, a very bad mood! I was fired from my ice cream truck job today! No more Fudgicles!.

I'll continue to make the typical Adam Sandler comedies..

My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. And when I die, they're $4 million in the hole..

I don't know what drives me to succeed..

In one day, I have times where I'm feeling great, I feel like I love my life, and then 2:30 rolls around and I'm the angriest man alive. My wife sees….

I like sitting and writing with my buddies..

My grandmother used to embarrass me more, when she would pick me up from school wearing a big fuzzy hat. I didn't like that..