Like it or not, we're still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation..

We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities..

There is no such thing as a moderate Republican anymore..

I have always defined political correctness as an elevation of sensitivity over truth..

The younger generation is supposed to rage against the machine, not for it. They're supposed to question authority, not question those who question a….

Down in Texas, Rick Perry announced he will not run for reelection. He said 'I executed one last woman, that fertilizer plant exploded, I returned ab….

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?.

The Eleventh Commandment: don't speak ill of a fellow Republican. What if the fellow Republican is doing something that hurts America? Isn't it the p….

Many people can't deal with unanswered questions, which religion exploits by providing answers, even if they are just made up by someone. This is als….

What a day for the Tea Party people. Did you see that? America's parks and fairgrounds were lost in a sea of man-boobs. They were venting their anger….

President Obama invited John McCain to the White House to give his opinion on Egypt, specifically what it's like to be a mummy..

When those myths were created, when the Bible was written, man didn't know what an atom or a germ was, or where the sun went at night, or why the wom….

God knows life sucks. It's right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, "I can't….

Disneyland's a mess. And it's not just the measles. Donald Duck has bird flu. Pocahontas has small pox. The Little Mermaid has crabs. And the Monorai….

There's a new iPad out...People are going nuts for this thing...And, today, Mitt Romney said, 'It's a flat piece of white plastic. If you can love it….

We survived the 1980's. Back then, the economic program was called 'trickle down.' That actually meant they were pissing on you. How the whole theory….

I'm definitely good. I'm not bad; I'm extremely honest, and I allow no bullshit to pass by my radar. And that will always get lots of people thinking….

It is appalling to make Jesus out of food! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go bake some communion wafers..

I couldn't run for any office. I think that religion is bad, weed is good, and babies are disgusting; who would vote for me?.

I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use parts of the animal that the Chinese can't ….

That Mitt Romney, he is a master campaigner. This week he was introducing his wife, and he said, 'She is the heavyweight champion of my life.” Which ….