Ever see this? It's a homeless guy but he's got a dog... The dog's really thrilled with this idea. The dog's going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself ….

It is easier to hate those we love, than love those whom we have hated..

Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them..

It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated..

I have always loved Las Vegas. It's a traditional place for lounge comics to perform, and I love that..

This is a thing I read by a scientist... it said scientists now say that a man thinks about sex once every 7.3 seconds. Now, I know what I think ever….

As evacuation eases the body, so occasional ejectment of passion seems to appease the agonies of the soul, and dispose to tranquility the agitations ….

A capacity for hating the object of desire is, perhaps, the best cure for love in cases of disappointment..

I've always been very averse to innuendo, especially sexual. I find it cowardly or something..

When people told the audience that [Sam Kinison] was good, he was accepted after that..

None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime..

We advise others better than ourselves..

I guess [Richard] Pryor was that good. I never saw him in a theater, but I imagine he was that good, because he was such a phenomenal actor..

They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it..

There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy ….

Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain..

A proper disposition of time leaves a man at leisure in the very bustle of affairs; without delaying the attention of his concerns to the last or giv….

I sort of have open invitations from a lot of people to do TV. But it's very hard for me to do roles in sitcoms and movies because I'm not a great ac….

You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there yo….

Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex..

I never had any interest in sitcoms or motion pictures or anything like that..