I am not afraid of crashing, my secret is . . . just before we hit the ground, I jump as high as I can..

All men should freely use those seven words which have the power to make any marriage run smoothly: You know dear, you may be right.

I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid..

And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl...there's a little voice that say, 'I wonder where he would go...'...if it hadn't been fo….

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers..

After creating the heaven, the earth, the ocean, and the entire animal kingdom, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was "Do….

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit..

Every romance does not lead to sex..

My grandfather said, "When you become senile, you won't know it.".

Well, I really don't know what the secret of success is but I can tell you that the secret of failure is to try to please everyone..

I said to a guy, "Tell me, what is it about cocaine that makes it so wonderful," and he said, "Because it intensifies your personality." I said, "Yes….

I’m supposed to figure out if the glass is half full or half empty,” I told her. Without a moment’s hesitation, in a split second, my grandmother shr….

Brown versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem..

The dentist drills some more and you hear him make a mistake. And to cover it up, they all say the same thing: "Okay, rinse.".

Criticizing is easy, art is difficult..

A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise..

A pelican that is wet walks with a gated limp, but a dry fish swims alone..

I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger..

Romance is a different word than sexual contact..

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from th….

We’ve got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch..