The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them..

The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people, and don't come in clearly enough..

I just don't think a lot of Republicans like it when single women have sex..

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally..

Hillary Clinton and Nancy Reagan have a lot in common - they're both smarter than their husbands and both consulted the stars for guidance, Nancy wit….

The House okayed the gasoline tax cut, which will increase the deficit, line the pockets of the oil companies, and hurt the environment; Dole said th….

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show..

It's going to be Perry, it's going to be Romney...It's sort of a battle for the soul of the Republican Party - and they have no soul, but the space w….

Today Obama was seen leaving the White House in a nurse's uniform on a flight to Cuba to smother Castro with a pillow..

Being a conservative also used to involve the concept of people being free to do whatever they want to do, as long as it doesn't hurt somebody else. ….

Republicans have pounced. They're outraged. They say, 'How dare you lie about caring for the people who got hurt in the war we lied them into?'.

The difference, I think, that matters is which of the religions are dangerous. They're all crazy, but which ones have the potential to turn that into….

When I hear from people that religion doesn't hurt anything, I say really? Well besides wars, the crusades, the inquisitions, 9-11, ethnic cleansing,….

Dealing w/ Hamas is like dealing w/ a crazy woman who’s trying to kill u – u can only hold her wrists so long before you have to slap her..

The New York Times - but the whole country gives it that weight. It's like the Asian kid in math class. Everybody in the media cheats off The New Yor….

Ted Cruz, of course, was furious that the big storm back east shut down the government. He said, 'That my job!' But you know, there is a big differen….

There are people who think everything is a conspiracy and I think they're crazy..

North Carolina right now is going apeshit in a way no state ever has. Take every crazy, angry idea your drunk, right-wing uncle mumbles at Thanksgivi….

Ebola has arrived in New York City. And I say, 'if it can make it there...it can make it anywhere!'.

How come regional pandering only works in one direction, right? You never see a Southern politician trying to win votes in New York State by saying, ….

Religion, it stops people from thinking because they think all the answers are in that one book; it impedes progress; it justifies crazy people. Flyi….