Reality: What a concept!.

Sometimes, keeping track of people. It's always a weird combination of worrying so much about the outside world, and not... you have to be more aware….

[when asked about what he was most thankful about]: Being alive. After heart surgery, you dig that part. Breath, family and friends are just amazing.….

I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they d….

Keith Richards is the only man who can make the Osbournes look Amish..

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll sa….

Whenever a big white man picks up a banjo, my cheeks tighten..

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?.

I have no desire to go anywhere near drugs. People say, "Aren't you tempted?" No, because of the ridiculousness of it..

I was a serious method actor until I visited this site..

There's a world out there. Open a window, and it's there..

The first time I ate organic whole-grain bread I swear it tasted like roofing material..

I like my wine like my women - ready to pass out..

Boys, you must strive to find your own voice, because the longer you wait to begin the less likely you are to find it at all..

The entire world will be in nuclear war, and only the Swiss will be going, 'what's that noise?'.

I don't do well with snakes and I can't dance..

A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They'd make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while..

You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren't paying attention to..

Just now when I said, "I have a crush on you," you didn't say, "no way loser". I'd rather have a lobotomy by a leper. That means something.

Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer: You can do it, just not as well as the others, really..

The Second Amendment! It says you have the right to bear arms, or the right to arm bears, whatever the hell you want to do!.