We don't stop going to school when we graduate..

The first time someone said, 'What are your measurements?' I answered, '37, 24, 38 - but not necessarily in that order.'.

Indiana is a state dedicated to basketball. Basketball, soybeans, hogs and basketball. Berkeley, needless to say, is not nearly as athletic. Berkeley….

If we were truly created by God, why do we occasionally bite the insides of our mouths?.

I think the English are bipolar. 'We're the greatest, no we're terrible' - that's a constant English struggle. Crime is down, there's little poverty ….

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?.

I've always enjoyed making people laugh. But in order for me to be funny, I have to get ticked off about something..

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head..

On getting mugged: I carry around months and months of receipts. I need a mugger who can file my VAT returns..

When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat..

Nations have come under the control of haters and fools..

I'm an appalling cook. I can just about create a glass of orange juice and a ham-and-cheese sandwich..

Free your mind and your ass will follow.

By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out..

I've been noticing gravity since I was very young..

I'm not an easy person to love. There are lots of times when I'm a very good boyfriend, but there are times when I'm useless. I mean, I'm a mess arou….

I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way..

Next to music beer was best..

There's no in between-you're either good or bad. We were in between..

For NASA, space is still a high priority..

My iPod holds 3,000 albums. I own, like, 90 albums. My iPod sits at home, sullen, frustrated, and underused, like a wife who gave up her career and t….