I think I throw the ball as hard as anyone. The ball just doesn't get there as fast..

I come from a family of musicians. Even the sewing machine is a Singer..

I might have tried bungee jumping, until I saw that video of that guy whose cord came untied. He didn't know it 'till he hit the ground. Oh, he flew ….

I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward ….

If I am occasionally a little over-dressed, I make up for it by being always immensely over-educated..

In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you. In Hollywood the weatherman gets a shooting schedule from all the major studios and….

Convey your passion and link your strengths to measurable results. Employers and interviewers love concrete data..

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand..

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too..

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal..

The doctor says to the patient, "Take your clothes off and stick your tongue out the window". "What will that do" asks the patient. The doctor says "….

If you would know the value of money, go and try to borrow some..

Give a man free hands, and you'll know where to find them..

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim..

I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong..

Tourists - have some fun with New york's hard-boiled cabbies. When you get to your destination, say to your driver, "Pay? I was hitchhiking.".

You can build a throne with bayonets, but it's difficult to sit on it..

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks..

Other crack teams get bat boomerangs and wall-climbing powers; we get Aquatruck..

I grew up on the beach and played side-out scoring all my life, but rally scoring is better for our sport. There is pressure on every play. You can't….

The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness..